Over time, I came to understand that in divorcing Doug, Bethany did something incredibly brave. She took all the hits for breaking up her family, from her parents, her siblings, her children and her friends, myself included, in order to seek a fuller, more integrated life.
In the midst of the divorce, when Bethany had lost 20 pounds and couldn't sleep and doubted herself, she clung to one simple truth, "I can't live the rest of my life without passion."
A passionless life. Not just sexless, but passionless. We all need to have a passion. Whether it's passion for our partner or spouse, our work, our children, our hobbies. The lack of sex in Bethany's marriage had eroded the passion of her spirit. She was living a rote, predictable, stagnant life.
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Monday, December 24, 2012
Friday, November 16, 2012
Sunday, November 11, 2012
Can You Save a Sexless Marriage?
Let’s be honest—sex is a big deal. Great sex makes you feel like you’ve transcended into some heavenly plane. For some people, it’s a bond between partners that can’t be created in any other way. When you look at it objectively, it’s sort of odd what a big deal we humans have made of it. It’s two bodies, moving in a weird way, with the ultimate goal of achieving orgasm, a goal which can be reached any other number of ways without all the mess. And yet if you consider all of our sex-related industries here in the USA—from pornography to Viagra and everything else—we worship sex probably even more than we worship any religion. Any way you look at it, sex matters to human beings.
Full piece is here
Full piece is here
Thursday, October 11, 2012
Why do women attempt to make men jealous
Women attempt to make men jealous for a reason and this reason may vary from person to person. One strong assumption would be reason of ASSURANCE. From time to time, women need a certain kind of affirmation that they are still valued and loved.
Everybody knows that in early part of any relationship, everything is beautiful and vibrant. The getting-to-know you stage works for the benefit of the two people involved and it sparks dynamism in the relationship as the declaration of emotion is almost always present and clear.
On the other hand, we also know that after some time, relationships go monotonous and unexciting. It's a point where people get comfortable in the union and tend to relax a bit. With that goes the natural inclination not to show more feelings (although unintentional) and thus, miss out on giving the partner the love affirmation.
Read more
Everybody knows that in early part of any relationship, everything is beautiful and vibrant. The getting-to-know you stage works for the benefit of the two people involved and it sparks dynamism in the relationship as the declaration of emotion is almost always present and clear.
On the other hand, we also know that after some time, relationships go monotonous and unexciting. It's a point where people get comfortable in the union and tend to relax a bit. With that goes the natural inclination not to show more feelings (although unintentional) and thus, miss out on giving the partner the love affirmation.
Read more
Thursday, May 24, 2012
Cheating Study: Men Who Cheat Are More Likely To Have Heart Attacks
Could cheating on your spouse cause a heart attack?
A new study by the University of Florence indicates that “sudden coital death” is more common when a man is engaging in extramarital sex in an unfamiliar setting than when he's having sex with his spouse at home, the Daily Mail reported Tuesday.
The researchers found that infidelity outside the home was associated with "a higher risk of major cardiovascular event," including fatal heart attacks. Heart attacks were less common when a man was having sex with his wife in a familiar setting.
Though they weren't able to pinpoint a precise reason for the correlation, the researchers offered some possible explanations, including a guilty conscious, stress related to keeping the affair under wraps and keeping up with the demands of a younger lover.
“Extra-martial sex may be hazardous and stressful because the lover is often younger than the primary partner and probably sex occurs more often following excessive drinking and/or eating," researcher Dr. Alessandra Fisher told the Daily Mail. “It is possible that a secret sexual encounter in an unfamiliar setting may significantly increase blood pressure and heart rate, leading to increased oxygen demand.”
Source
A new study by the University of Florence indicates that “sudden coital death” is more common when a man is engaging in extramarital sex in an unfamiliar setting than when he's having sex with his spouse at home, the Daily Mail reported Tuesday.
The researchers found that infidelity outside the home was associated with "a higher risk of major cardiovascular event," including fatal heart attacks. Heart attacks were less common when a man was having sex with his wife in a familiar setting.
Though they weren't able to pinpoint a precise reason for the correlation, the researchers offered some possible explanations, including a guilty conscious, stress related to keeping the affair under wraps and keeping up with the demands of a younger lover.
“Extra-martial sex may be hazardous and stressful because the lover is often younger than the primary partner and probably sex occurs more often following excessive drinking and/or eating," researcher Dr. Alessandra Fisher told the Daily Mail. “It is possible that a secret sexual encounter in an unfamiliar setting may significantly increase blood pressure and heart rate, leading to increased oxygen demand.”
Source
Tuesday, May 08, 2012
What Is Love?
We live under a massive cultural delusion about the nature of real love. Propagated by mainstream media, from the time you're born you're inundated with the belief that love is a feeling and that when you find "the one" you'll sense it in your gut and be overcome by an undeniable sense of knowing. When the feeling and corresponding knowing fade (for the knowing is intimately linked to the feeling) and the work of learning about real love begins, most people take the diminished feeling as a sign that they're in the wrong relationship and walk away. And then they start over again, only to find that the now-familiar knowing and feeling fade again... and again... and again.
If love isn't a feeling, what is it?
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If love isn't a feeling, what is it?
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Friday, March 23, 2012
What men and women notice on dates
Dating costs plenty of dough, no doubt about it. But when it comes to spending your hard-earned cash, where should you invest it in order to get the most mileage when it comes to dating? In other words, before hitting the meet-and-greet scene next weekend, what’s really going to make you more attractive to the opposite sex — and what’s a waste of your dating dollars? Before you max out a credit card trying to win your date’s affections (or convince someone you’re hot), check out these interesting tidbits we dug up for more budget-conscious men and women. Because when it comes to putting your best flirting foot forward, it doesn’t always have to be about your shoes!
1. Men say that having gorgeous hair trumps a curvy figure. Trying to decide between a pre-date trip to the salon or Victoria’s Secret, ladies? Go for the fab hair option. According to a recent survey conducted by Pantene, 60% of men surveyed would rather date a woman with great hair than noticeable curves — and 74% of them said they notice a woman because of her hair. In fact, a full 44% of male respondents said that hair was the first thing they notice about a woman… even before her clothes (26%), legs (25%) and makeup (4%). Most of the men who took Pantene’s poll also said they’d be more likely to approach a woman at a bar with great hair than one who was wearing a low-cut shirt. This is great news, since monthly hair upkeep is more of a necessity than sexy lingerie if you’re a woman who’s on a budget. Of course, that doesn’t mean you can’t wear sassy underwear if you’ve got it — but when change is tight (like in this tanked economy), it’s good to know that a well-timed mane flip can still make you a main attraction.
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1. Men say that having gorgeous hair trumps a curvy figure. Trying to decide between a pre-date trip to the salon or Victoria’s Secret, ladies? Go for the fab hair option. According to a recent survey conducted by Pantene, 60% of men surveyed would rather date a woman with great hair than noticeable curves — and 74% of them said they notice a woman because of her hair. In fact, a full 44% of male respondents said that hair was the first thing they notice about a woman… even before her clothes (26%), legs (25%) and makeup (4%). Most of the men who took Pantene’s poll also said they’d be more likely to approach a woman at a bar with great hair than one who was wearing a low-cut shirt. This is great news, since monthly hair upkeep is more of a necessity than sexy lingerie if you’re a woman who’s on a budget. Of course, that doesn’t mean you can’t wear sassy underwear if you’ve got it — but when change is tight (like in this tanked economy), it’s good to know that a well-timed mane flip can still make you a main attraction.
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Tuesday, February 14, 2012
Have Cheating on Your Mind?
Scarlett Johansson recently commented about her divorce to Ryan Reynolds, saying that she wasn't prepared "to hunker down and do the work" necessary to keep her marriage together.
Once a relationship moves past the butterfly stage and into the less exciting and more routine stage, you and your partner need to be more deliberate about keeping your relationship on track.
A romantic relationship does not just happen; it is created. This emotionally intimate bond you share with your partner is best when you feel understood and accepted. It's enhanced through talking intimately about feelings, thoughts, and needs.
Read the rest
Once a relationship moves past the butterfly stage and into the less exciting and more routine stage, you and your partner need to be more deliberate about keeping your relationship on track.
A romantic relationship does not just happen; it is created. This emotionally intimate bond you share with your partner is best when you feel understood and accepted. It's enhanced through talking intimately about feelings, thoughts, and needs.
Read the rest
Divorced But Stuck Together
Everyone knows at least one married couple who stayed together "because of the kids". Today, it is increasingly common to hear about couples who are getting divorced, and then continue living together "because of the house."
In the good old days (circa 2006), when couples decided to separate or divorce, and they owned a house, they usually agreed to sell the house, divide up the (piles of) accumulated equity, and go their separate ways. Alternatively, one spouse would buy out the other's interest, which was relatively painless given the abundant blessings of quick and easy refinances and the aforementioned piles of accumulated equity or other liquid assets.
Those were the days, my friend.
Read the rest
In the good old days (circa 2006), when couples decided to separate or divorce, and they owned a house, they usually agreed to sell the house, divide up the (piles of) accumulated equity, and go their separate ways. Alternatively, one spouse would buy out the other's interest, which was relatively painless given the abundant blessings of quick and easy refinances and the aforementioned piles of accumulated equity or other liquid assets.
Those were the days, my friend.
Read the rest
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